~My Sunshine~

My life was not normal as others.Worst childhood which haunts me till today and miserable teen life.But i managed to rise up again from all those pains for the sake of my mum and brother.Nothing is important compare to this 2 angels in my life.Mum,an iron woman who successfully raised her kids very well and my brother who is the backbone of the family now.3 of us when through hell together in the past but now perfectly happy family.Indeed we don't spent time together so much as everyone is at a corner but we fit in perfectly whenever we are back home.Patrick,a man who i love the most in my life.Gosh! I'm so proud of him,he was always the smart kid at home while me opposite.But not even once he looked down on me but he used to teach me maths which i hate the most in my life and somehow i passed because of him.I still remember how happy was mum when she saw my STPM result.For the first time i saw many A's in my slip.Hahaha..That happiness was priceless.My responsibilities increased now.Make sure mum gets all the happiness in the earth and let Patrick to finish his degree. 

My life is awesome when i know your part of my journey too now.You changed my perception about love and life.Yesh you :) I have no idea how i fell for you because i locked my heart very long ago.  I had build up a high wall around my heart so that no one else can enter into it anymore but i wonder how u came in?? No more nights with tears but im smiling alot for the first time in my life.Too many happiness and joy in my heart and all because of you...You gave me a new life.

Yes i love you.I admit that but about the next stage,let it happen by itself.I can't imagine anyone else in my life besides you.I fell for you completely. You are all about i can think for now.Hope things will just go as i wish.Seriously,i'm not ready for any heart break again.I wonder where is my sleepless night with tears and pains.LOST ! Hahaha..i feel new and fresh again.Of coz,first pain can never be removed from heart but i start living my life again.My life moves on.

I decided to stay away from everyone that can give me pains and pull me down again. I'm staying away from all those unwanted people.Far away from them will be the best medicines for my heart.I have too many people in my life who called family,friends,besties and special one.So what else i want again? A perfect mother who is there for me all the time when i need a shoulder,a brother who is more like a father for me,my uncle who is there for me every time i'm down and lovely cousins,friends who are there for me whenever i need them,my besties who will come down all the way just to see a smile on my face and now extra angel came into the family.My special one.Haha..shuuu not going to tell anything for now.But he is equally important now for me.I have everything in my life,so what else i need again?I'm happy God had bless me with wonderful angels in my life.My life is always simple and perfect in my way :)

Why this Pain??

I'm in deep pain and hurt.How can I explain the pain which kills me daily,each seconds,each minutes and each day.The pain is getting bigger and growing in me daily.Why do i need to do this?? Why must i meet u in my life? Why you came into my life ??Its all started when i start liking u because of pithy..I should not do that!
How am i going to face the society and my family? Everything is my fault and I know i can't fix things now.Its too late for everything.I am moving on no matter what.Please forgive me

Why should i fall in love and suffer like this.Why so much of pains in life?I wish life will be easier if i just end my life but I need to be there for my family!! I need to be strong enough to overcome this pains!! I'm too complicated!!! Even i don't know what i need in my life..Argghhh! I don't know what im writing here too..Life plsssss be good to me!